Just a quickie.

On the long drive back home just now from causeway point, I had a good long chat with my dad. A chat on life, studies and oac.

I feel as if I have failed the team, like, everyone is pulling their own weight except me. My failure to do ok in my grades have caused me to be suspended, and that is such a disgrace to the team..

"But have you ever realised, that maybe, just maybe, the team has let you down?"

No they have not, have they? Yet if we are all harping on teamwork, and how no man gets left behind, then why is it that the team is making demands of me, to get over and done with the suspension and get back into the team? I can't do it, I'm not at that level of balance between oac and my studies yet. Has the team ever considered my career as a student? My prospects? My life? Is all this insignificant compared to the greater whole? If everyone matters, and our views are appreciated and important, then care for my studies and how I'm coping with the stress of school work and oac should come naturally. Am I really selfish in saying I can't cope? Or is the team being selfish in its goals regardless of the cost to my life by pressuring (I'm not saying they do so maliciously, but I'm feeling the stress) me to contribute through self-sacrifice?

If the views of every member are important and treasured, how much more so the member! So I plead with you, my team, my friends.. Its great to want to achieve more in our term as instructors and to leave a legacy of inspiration behind, but by working towards the ideal, let us not neglect reality's demands. By doing badly for your promos, you will bring disgrace to oac, because our parents, our principals, even our peers, will attribute our poor grades to be caused by oac. Imagine this next year:
"Hey joe, i think i'm gonna join oac.. what do you think? sounds cool?"
"what? I heard that the people there did badly for their exams.. their activities are seriously damn exhausting.. no time, no mood to study. they are currently struggling to cope with their studies now.. don't join, later you become like them.."

Very zai huh. I know we all have oac in our hearts.. some more so than others.. to live up to the legacy of the previous batch and to create our own significant history.. but please, couldn't we cut down on intensity until after promos at least? The grades DO matter. We are called students for a reason after all.

For yourself, myself, and oac.

PS: this post is not targeting anyone in specific. talking about the team dynamics in general. Any offense caused is regretted. I think this PS is stupid, but neccessary.